I taught a lesson at church this week on Jeremiah.
Chapters 1 through 3, 7, 16 through 18, and 20.
I went in thinking it would be a lesson about a sad prophet and a stubborn people. I came out with something I keep chewing on. Especially as a parent.
Here’s the thing. Jeremiah isn’t a story about what was always going to happen. It’s a story about choices. It’s an agency story, not a destiny story.
Let me walk you through it.
Where We Are
About a hundred years before Jeremiah, the unthinkable happened. Assyria swept into the northern kingdom of Israel. Ten tribes were scattered and lost.
Only little Judah was left. Jerusalem. The temple.
For a while, it looked like Judah learned the lesson. A good young king named Josiah tore down the idols and brought the people back to the Lord.
Then Josiah was killed in battle.
And almost overnight, Judah went right back to the idols.
That’s when God called a young man who didn’t think he could even speak. Jeremiah.
Meanwhile the world was shifting. Babylon crushed Egypt and turned its eyes toward Jerusalem. In those same streets, another prophet was preaching the same warning. His name was Lehi. He took his family and fled into the wilderness.
Jeremiah stayed.
For forty years he pleaded with his people to turn back. Almost no one listened. And he lived to watch Babylon burn Jerusalem and the temple to the ground.
But through all of it, God never stopped pleading with His children. And He never stopped promising to bring them home.
How God Operates
When I look at how the Savior works with people, I see a pattern with three parts:
- Express love
- Honor agency
- Invite accountability
All three. Together.
We tend to drop one. Sometimes we jump straight to accountability and lose the love. Sometimes we keep the peace and skip accountability. And sometimes we try to control the outcome, which takes away agency.
God doesn’t do that. You can see the pattern all the way back in the Garden.
“Thou shalt not eat of it, nevertheless, thou mayest choose for thyself, for it is given unto thee.” (Moses 3:17)
There’s the law. That’s accountability.
There’s “thou mayest choose.” That’s agency.
And there’s a Savior already provided. That’s love.
Same pattern with Adam. Same pattern with Judah. Same pattern with us.
The Agency Chain
Three verses really opened this up for me. Read them in order and they tell a story.
God pleads. He doesn’t force.
“Wherefore I will yet plead with you, saith the Lord, and with your children’s children will I plead.” (Jeremiah 2:9)
After everything Israel did, God doesn’t force them. He pleads. For generations.
That’s agency honored.
Consequences become the teacher.
“Thine own wickedness shall correct thee, and thy backslidings shall reprove thee: know therefore and see that it is an evil thing and bitter, that thou hast forsaken the Lord thy God.” (Jeremiah 2:19)
God doesn’t need to zap anybody. Our own choices bring the correction.
President Boyd K. Packer taught something I’ve never forgotten. We’re punished by our sins, not just for them.
That’s accountability.
Why God lets it happen.
“…wherefore they are agents unto themselves… they taste the bitter, that they may know to prize the good.” (Moses 6:55)
Notice the word. Bitter.
The bitter of Jeremiah 2:19 is the bitter of Moses 6:55. God lets His children taste consequences so they’ll learn to prize the good.
Taste. Not feast.
The one who turned away can turn back.
This is my favorite part.
The Hebrew word behind “backsliding” is shuv. It means to turn. Backsliding is turning away. Returning is turning back.
Same word. Opposite direction.
Jeremiah uses it over a hundred times. Listen to it in this verse:
“Return, ye backsliding children, and I will heal your backslidings.” (Jeremiah 3:22)
In Hebrew it reads something like: Turn, you turning children, and I’ll heal your turning.
The very ability that let you walk away is the ability that brings you home.
Agency, Not Destiny: The Potter
In chapter 18, God sends Jeremiah down to the potter’s house.
“And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter: so he made it again… As the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are ye in mine hand.” (Jeremiah 18:4, 6)
Pro tip: look at the phrase “made it again.” In Hebrew it’s literally “he returned and made it.”
Shuv again.
When we turn to Him, He turns to reshape us.
And then God says this:
“If that nation… turn from their evil, I will repent of the evil that I thought to do unto them.” (Jeremiah 18:8)
Nothing is locked in. The door is open.
So what do the people say?
“There is no hope: but we will walk after our own devices.” (Jeremiah 18:12)
That one stopped me.
The question was never whether God can reshape us. It’s whether we choose to stay soft in His hands.
“There is no hope” is a fixed mindset. Tony Robbins says something close to this. If you decide a problem can’t be solved, you’ll be right. That’s Jeremiah 18:12 exactly.
Covenant people believe they can change. That’s the whole point of the clay.
The Gathering: One by One, to Jesus
One of a city. Two of a family.
“Turn, O backsliding children, saith the Lord; for I am married unto you: and I will take you one of a city, and two of a family, and I will bring you to Zion.” (Jeremiah 3:14)
Here’s what’s going on underneath the word “married.”
The Hebrew is ba’al. It means husband. Master. Lord.
It’s also the name of Baal, the Canaanite god Israel was chasing.
So God is making a point. You’re running after Baal. But I’m your real ba’al. Your true Husband. (Hosea 2:16 makes the same play on words.)
And notice how the gathering happens. Not as a mass migration. One of a city. Two of a family. Individual and personal.
Notice who they’re gathered to, too. Not first to a place or a program. To the Husband. To the Lord Himself.
The Savior shows us what one by one looks like.
When the resurrected Savior came to the Nephites, He said:
“Arise and come forth unto me, that ye may thrust your hands into my side, and also that ye may feel the prints of the nails in my hands and in my feet…” (3 Nephi 11:14)
And they did.
“…and did see with their eyes and did feel with their hands… going forth one by one until they had all gone forth.” (3 Nephi 11:15)
There were about 2,500 people there (3 Nephi 17:25).
He could’ve just let the crowd look at Him. Instead, He let every single person come to Him. One at a time.
That’s the gathering. One by one. Each person getting their own witness of Him.
Greater than the Exodus.
“It shall no more be said, The Lord liveth, that brought up the children of Israel out of the land of Egypt; But, The Lord liveth, that brought up the children of Israel… from all the lands whither he had driven them… Behold, I will send for many fishers… and after will I send for many hunters.” (Jeremiah 16:14–16)
Think about that. The gathering in the last days will be a bigger miracle than the parting of the Red Sea.
And Jesus picked up Jeremiah’s image. “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men” (Matthew 4:19).
Gathered to Christ. His mercy covers the rest.
This is the part I want to be really clear about.
The gathering is bringing people to Jesus. Not just to a building. Not just to a baptism date. To Jesus Christ. Helping each person find their own path to Him and walk it, whatever that looks like for them.
“Return… for I am merciful, saith the Lord, and I will not keep anger for ever. Only acknowledge thine iniquity.” (Jeremiah 3:12–13)
The Hebrew word for merciful there is hasid. It comes from hesed, which means covenant loyalty. God is calling Himself the Loyal Love One.
So we follow His word as best we can, as far as we understand it. And His mercy takes care of the rest. (D&C 137:9 says we’re judged according to the desires of our hearts.)
Gathering Our Own Families
From here it gets personal.
Start with this:
“Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee.” (Jeremiah 1:5)
God knew our children and grandchildren before we did. They’re His children first.
Here’s what I’ve had to accept as a parent. We can’t control our kids’ choices. We never could. What we have is influence. Example. Teaching. Love.
Jeremiah lived this. Forty years. Almost zero control. Faithful influence anyway.
He was a fisher, not a catcher. The catch belongs to the Lord.
And remember who the Potter is:
“As the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are ye in mine hand.” (Jeremiah 18:6)
God is the Potter. Not us. We don’t get to grab the wheel.
So when one of our kids is struggling, maybe the better question isn’t “how do I fix this?” Maybe it’s “what is the Lord trying to teach me?”
If we really believe in God, our child will be guided. Just maybe not on our timetable.
Remember Jeremiah 2:9. “With your children’s children will I plead.” God works across generations. On His clock.
The goal is joy, not fear.
“Obey my voice… and walk ye in all the ways that I have commanded you, that it may be well unto you.” (Jeremiah 7:23)
That it may be well unto you.
We want our kids to follow Jesus because of the joy, the blessings, and the peace it brings. Not because they’re scared of getting punished.
Fear might get compliance.
Love gets conversion.
The Wrap Up
God’s pattern with Judah is His pattern with us. And it’s the pattern He invites us to use with our families:
Love them. Honor their agency. Invite accountability. And never close the door.
The gathering happens one by one. And it’s a gathering to Jesus Christ.
We do our best to follow Him and lead our families to Him. His mercy takes care of the rest.
I closed the lesson by reading Jeremiah 3:22 together with the class. Both halves. God’s invitation, and the people’s answer:
“Return, ye backsliding children, and I will heal your backslidings. Behold, we come unto thee; for thou art the Lord our God.”
Here’s a question I’m still sitting with. Maybe you’ll sit with it too.
How does it change things to see our children and grandchildren as His children first?
Let me know where that takes you.